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10 Calming Techniques You Can Use When Your Child With ADHD Is Having A Meltdown

By Lola M. Swaby

Let’s Be Real, when your child with ADHD is having a meltdown, it can feel like a tornado just tore through your house, complete with howling, flying toys, and lots of chaos. Been there? You’re not alone. Here are ten calming techniques you can use to bring things back from "DEFCON 1" to peaceful-ish parenting.


Get Low and Breathe Slow With ADHD Child

1. Get Low And Breathe Slow

Kneel to your child with ADHD eye level and model deep, exaggerated breaths. Don’t worry if it feels silly, deep breathing is contagious (in a good way).


Say Calming Phrases To Your ADHD Child

2. Use A Calming Phrase

Try telling your child with ADHD the following phrase: “You’re safe. I’m here. We’ll figure this out.” Say it like you’re narrating a bedtime story, even if you’re holding back a scream.


Offer Your ADHD Child A Pressure Hug Or Blanket Wrap

3. Offer a Pressure Hug or Blanket Wrap

Firm hugs may calm your child's nervous system. If you are not a hugger, try having your child with ADHD wrap up like a cozy burrito in their favorite blanket.


Break Out A Calm-Down Kit For Your ADHD Child

4. Break Out A Calm-Down Kit

Create a mini toolkit with fidget toys, stress balls, soft fabrics, and maybe even headphones for your child with ADHD. Let your child choose what helps in the moment.


Have a Calm-Down Zone For Your ADHD Child

5. Have a Calm-Down Zone

Create a calm, cozy spot for your child with ADHD to use as a calm-down zone. You can decorate the spot with items such as pillows, fairy lights, and your child's favorite stuffed friend. NEVER use this spot for a time-out; it should only be used as your child's chill-out zone (a place to read a book, listen to music, and/or play with a favorite toy).


Try Calming Sounds With Your ADHD Child

6. Try Calming Sounds

Gentle music, nature sounds, or white noise machines can often soothe the overstimulated senses of a child with ADHD. It also comes with the added bonus of allowing you an opportunity to get a moment to breathe and calm your nerves.


Offer Your ADHD Child Two Simple Choices

7. Offer Two Simple Choices

You may also try to regain some control over your  child with ADHD by giving them two simple choice options: “Do you want to sit here or go to your quiet corner?” Remember, choices = empowerment.


Use Visual Aids With Your ADHD Child

8. Use Visual Aids

Try showing your child with ADHD pictures or cards that walk them through calming steps. When words aren’t working, visuals often can.


Try Labeling Your ADHD Child's Emotions

9. Name It to Tame It

Try labeling your child's emotion: “You seem angry. That’s okay. Let’s figure out what you need.” This may help your  child with ADHD feel seen.


Model Calm For Your ADHD Child

10. Model Calm (Even If You’re Faking It)

When speaking with your child with ADHD, your tone matters more than your words. Act calm, even if your inner voice is doing backflips. Save YOUR meltdown for the pantry later.


Final Thought

No parent handles meltdowns perfectly. What matters is that you show up, stay present, and remind your child with ADHD, and yourself, that this too shall pass. You're not alone! You're doing amazing work, and your child with ADHD, even in their hardest moments, is worth every ounce of love and patience you can provide.





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